Dear Leader, Dear Leader,

Kim Jong-Un

Where have you gone?

Kim Jong-Il's son?

Do you have a disease?

Are you discouraged?

Did you eat some bad cheese?

Or have you been purged?

What happened to you?

Has your tent been folded?

Has there been a coup?

Have the generals revolted?

Did you make a break

Looking for freedom?

Where's Dennis Rodman

When we need him?

Does your leg hurt, kid?

Are you on crutches?

Are you in Madrid

Shacked up with a duchess?

Are you toast?

In the hands of goons?

Did you get engrossed

Watching Disney cartoons?

You are the law,

And you are the state.

Did you go to a spa

To lose some weight?

Have you told your sister

From now on, it's her land?

Hugged her and kissed her

And gone back to Switzerland?

We stand in our ranks

Your loyal lackeys

In trucks and tanks

In identical khakis.

Dear leader, let us hear,

Give us an idea,

Where you are, when you'll appear

In Korea.